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A blog about the never-ending frustrations of an American living in the nightmare known as modern Japan....the whole truth and nothing but the truth!

Thursday, July 31, 2003

Wow! Another quiet day! I guess the lunatic fringe must be saving up for this weekend....I feel like I am jinxing myself when I mention these quiet days but they are so rare......

At least I have a few quiet days here....in my former residence I was laid siege to by four of the noisiest dogs that could be found anywhere in Japan! They barked almost continuously, 18 hours a day, seven days a week! They didnt all bark at the same time, mind you.....they organized themselves into a "doggy barking schedule" and took it in turn to bark in shifts....."Oh, it couldn't have been that bad!" you might say.....but yes, dear reader, it was.

First, you have to understand what a typical Japanese neighborhood looks like. Tiny, shoebox, houses are crammed into every inch of space with no yards and absolutely no privacy. You can look out your kitchen window and read your neighbor's newspaper....and you are also close enough to reach over and change the page if he dawdles too long over the call girls ads or pin-ups. Ten houses are placed in the same space we would put one middle-class house in America. There is no planning or zoning. Just stuff as many people as you can into as small a space as you can.

Now, common sense says that if you have a tiny house, with no yard and not even enough open space to swing a cat, then you really shouldn't rush right out and buy a big, dumb, noisy dog that needs several acres of open space to romp in to be reasonably happy. But, this being Japan, the inbred, nincompoops rush out and buy not just one big, stupid dog, but pairs of them! Yes, thats right! Not one...but TWO!!! "I can buy two inbred golden retrievers and keep them tied to the front door and together they will be happy!!! I must buy matching bandanas for them so when I take them for walk around the block once a day they will look so cute!!!! Cho Kawaii!!!!"

So, I had the misfortune to move into a house that was surrounded by idiot, bucktoothed, inbred dog owners who kept their beasts penned up in about one or two square meters of space and then proceeded to let them bark and howl all fucking day long!!!! The next door neighbor had two big brutes which barked all morning and all afternoon long. Now remember, they are only three meters from my front door and they are fully grown, large sized dogs who had never been disciplined in their entire lives....their owners never cared for a moment that they were driving half the neighborhood crazy...."Oh, arent my dogs cute!!!!" was the typical response when they met their grim-faced neighbors on their daily walks.

Across the street was another inbred dog owner with a yowling, howling bastard of a dachshund which barked and howled anytime someone farted or opened a window. Flush the toilet and this dog would go mad! Slam the door a little too hard and he would be at the gate yammering away in his sickening, skull-splitting, high-pitched howl. His owner just stood there and laughed with unfeigned delight. That old bat was so proud of her stupid, spoiled-rotten, bastard of a hell hound! I once saw it at the local market....actually, I heard it a good 300 meters away since she had it tied up in front of the store. As I passed by I very innocently gave that stupid dog a drop kick that shut him up for about five seconds.....the look of absolute shock on that dogs face made it even more pleasurable! It was the first time anyone had punished the dog....An old guy standing nearby just laughed and gave me a thumbs up.

The absolute worst was the beast from Hell which lived on the other side of my house. He was absolutely insane! The owners never walked him and never paid it the slightest attention. It was a large dog and had obviously spent it's entire life on that tiny porch watching the world from behind a gate. He was as black as the ace of spades and his heart was even blacker! He barked and howled continuously for the entire day! Non-stop, 18 hours a day, 7 days a week!!! He would actually leap onto the wall surrounding the house and sit there perched like some demented rooster and howl.....not bark....just howling in abject misery and neglect. Get near the beast and he would try to rip your throat out....he was completely demented and should have been put down along with his stupid owners.....but this is Japan.

I called the police about this dog because it was obviously evidence of neglect and abuse. A fat, pig of a policeman, with his finger up his nose turned up and proceeded to abuse me for calling his fat, lazy, ass out to complain about a noisy, demented dog. He was all bluff and bluster until I very obviously took down his badge number and asked for his superior's name. He then promised to investigate and that was the last I ever saw of him. Of course, nothing was ever done. I called his office several times and put the phone out the window and let him hear the noise but all he said was "Shogunnai" which is the Japs answer to everything. It means, "It can't be helped!"

More later...I can't let you think that was the end of the matter....no, not by a long shot! Stand-by for part two....

Wednesday, July 30, 2003

Evolution?
Well, I feel refreshed! It's nice to have a quiet day for once.....who knows what right wing/left wing madness tomorrow will bring. You may wonder why there is so much right wing and left-wing activity in this part of Japan. There are several reasons for this:
The first reason and probably the most obvious, is that this part of Japan is inhabited by incredibly stupid people. They are not just your average stupid people either. We are talking about a level of stupidity that you can only achieve from many, many generations of inbreeding. You see, moving households in Japan is a very rare occurrence. Many people still live in the same place where they were born which is the same place their grandparents and great-grandparents and so on and so on were born. Visit a Buddhist temple around here and you will see this clearly illustrated. The graves found there often contain the cremated remains of many hundreds of generations of the same family. The ornate marker stones contain the complete history of the family dating back over 1000 years. They are replaced every so many years, but the long, uninterrupted flow of descendants is still re-recorded on the newer stones. Thus, you can see the entire history of a family. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that small groups of people living in isolated areas for many thousands of years are going to have a certain amount of inbreeding...
The effects of this inbreeding can be clearly seen. Besides the fact that many of the locals walking around here would not win any beauty contests and the shape of the dental palates would make Western dental surgeons shriek in horror, their strident support for fascist, Emperor-loving, racist, xenophobe, right-wing political organizations confirms my theory. Any bonehead who still believes that the inbred, slightly-retarded Emperor is a god has to have been the product of many generations of cousins playing hide the sausage.
The second explanation for this immature, right wing vs. left wing, political hullabaloo is related to my first explanation. Although most Japanese have lived in the same place for many generations there are still a significant number of people who have moved to new areas within Japan and have mixed with the locals introducing new biological material into the local gene pool. Some of these people have actually traveled abroad and have encountered new ideas such as democracy, human rights, law and order, governance, as well as other novel concepts relating to science and innovation, art and literature, and most importantly, the flush toilet.
When these more advanced people come into contact with their lesser advanced brethren there was bound to be conflict. New ideas vs. brute force....Cro-Magnons vs. Neanderthals....History does tend to repeat itself. The fascist and communist battle it out in the streets now just as their Neanderthal and Cro-magnon ancestors battled it out in the forests millions of years ago. The question is which group will survive?
I get to watch this process of evolution occurring right before my eyes everyday! Wait! Did I say evolution? I meant to say de-evolution....because that is actually what is happening here in Japan everyday....they are not advancing along the linear, evolutionary path....they are, in fact, retreating along the linear, evolutionary path! Just wait and see.... All of Japan will be worshipping the Emperor again, waving the Rising Sun flag, and planning a "New and Improved" Greater East-Asia Co-prosperity Sphere real soon... if the Neanderthals win.
Ahhhh....a quiet day! How long will it last? Long enough, I hope, for me to take a nap to recover from the beer I swilled last night......all night long I had nightmares of big, black, busses full of gibbering, jabbering, Japanese, jackanapes parading up and down the street shouting out their hateful, racist slogans while serenading me with the best Imperial Japanese Army marching band music of 1937, Vol. 10.......

More later....once I recover from this hangover.....this RIGHT WING hangover!

Tuesday, July 29, 2003

Wasted away in Hirohitoville,
Looking for this nightmare to halt,
Some Japs they say, there is a woman to blame,
But I know, it's my own damn fault.....

Yes, I got hammered tonite....it's the only way to survive a day like this....Fascist and Commies fighting it out all day in the street with loudspeakers the size of volkswagons.....what's a poor foreigner to do? Drown his sorrows in a pint of beer and hope for a better day.....There's not much else....the police stood idly by all day. What would happen if I made such a racket? Arrested, beaten up, forced to confess to any unsolved crime they could pin on me, jail, abuse, and twenty years later deported.....a shattered, jibbering, mess.
I hope you are someplace nice right now as you read this.....I wish I were.
Ok, I can't write or think right now because the fascist and the communist are having a shouting match out in the street in front of my building....Both groups have loudspeakers and are trying to shout each other down with the fascist having the advantage in their massive, armored buses festooned with rising sun flags and speakers the size of volkswagons....the commies are just a bunch of geriatrics waving their red banners and screeching their slogans over hand-held megaphones.....the noise is unbelievable and so is the complete indifference of the entire population of this city.....they just toddle on by as if nothing is happening....."Got to get to the pachinko parlour and feed my gambling addiction!"

Meanwhile, I am going to take some aspirin and retire into my sound-proofed closet where the sound of Japanese idiocy is slightly less than a dull roar.....God bless the Emperor! He is GOD! Banzai!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, July 28, 2003

Different uses for comic books....
In Japan, comic books or "manga" as they are known, are not just for kids. Many adults read manga which are not designed for young readers. These are sexually explicit and usually involve sadism, bondage, sexual assault and gang rape as their central themes. They are extremely graphic in nature and are, of course, available in Japan at every bookstore and newsstand without age restrictions. It is a common sight to see males of all ages reading these perverted manga quite unashamedly on the train or even in the office. It is not considered strange or even deviant behaviour.

So, let's speculate on the influence that these manga might have on young people. Do you think violent, sexual scenes might have a negative affect on their young minds? Might violent scenes of gang rape and sexual assault against women encourage the same behavior in young people? Would seeing these scenes everyday make it seem like normal behavior to you? Might you develop a perverse image of women? This could explain why sexual assault, rape and even gang rape are so common in Japan.

Recently, a group of teenagers started their own underage call-girl ring. There is nothing strange about this. Many young girls are involved in this activity in Japan. However, what makes this one different is that the teenagers involved modeled their business on one that they had read about in their favorite....wait for it....MANGA! Yes, that's right. Their favorite manga had a detailed description of how to run such a business and served as their business model until one of their underage girls was arrested for prostitution. She then led the keystone cops onto her pimps who were also arrested. Interestingly enough, none of their adult customers were arrested or even questioned......hmmmmm.

End of story? No, not quite. The cops explained to the kids that running an underage prostitution business placed them in direct competition with the local yakuza and that the yakuza would have made "mincemeat" out of them if they had caught them instead of the police. So, what can we determine about the Japanese police from this statement?

1)That Japanese police allow the Yakuza to run illicit businesses without police interference?
2)That Japanese cops knowingly allow criminal sexual activity involving minors to occur?
3)That Japanese cops are spineless, lazy, corrupt, idiots that should all be discharged and then flogged through the streets of every Japanese city?
4)All of the above?

I will leave it up to you to decide. Remember: Japan is a safety country!

Sunday, July 27, 2003

Lolitas are big money in perverted Japan...
In case you haven’t read any of my earlier posts, school-girl prostitution is a big business here in Lolita-obsessed Japan. I am not just talking about high school girls either. Many junior high and even elementary school girls are involved. Yes, that's right.... “safety” Japan is the land of kiddie porn and kiddie prostitution! Whereas this would be automatically considered a punishable offense in other advanced, modern countries, it has only recently been made illegal here in this wonderfully "safe" country.

Now that it is technically illegal here for adult men to solicit 12 year olds for sex these cases are actually making it into the news. Last week’s big story involved four 6th graders who were found blindfolded, naked and handcuffed in an apartment in Tokyo. The man who had enticed them into the apartment with offers of easy money was found dead. He was a known pedophile and was wanted by police for his involvement in schoolgirl sex operations. It is not surprising that he wasn’t in police custody since police very seldom take a pro-active stance to preventing crime. They only react after some tragedy occurs. Then, they rush out and arrest the wrong person and beat him into a confession....but that is another story for another day.

Apparently our pervert killed himself although it was doubtful it was because of guilt. A raid of his other residence netted police 1000 porn videos allegedly involving minors. This man had apparently found a ready market for his videos and for schoolgirl prostitutes in safe, crime-free Japan. He had been staying at a luxury hotel in Tokyo, paying his bills in cash and generally having a lovely life on the income generated by his kiddie-sex businesses. He shouldn’t have been hard to find. Of course, the police were too busy warming their seats to look for him.

These perverts can easily find older girls willing to recruit younger girls. It is alleged that he used high school girls to recruit elementary school girls. A high school girl interviewed in the Japanese press claims to make around $100 an hour recruiting these younger girls. One former operator of a dating club that employs elementary school girls also claims that he makes more money off them because “they work for less.” In contrast, junior high school girls, he moans, “already know the going rates so they drive a hard bargain.” He adds that although they are primary school girls, “you don’t feel a drop of sympathy for them!”
My! What a safe country!
Ok troops....I am busy right now but please stand by for more abuse from the land of kiddie porn and kiddie prostitution!

Saturday, July 26, 2003

"Gang rape shows that the people who do it are still vigorous, and that is ok." Comment by Seiichi Ota, senior member of the Liberal Democratic Party of Japan.
Mr. Ota's comments touched a nerve in this country which still has refused to accept responsibility for the bloodthirsty actions of the Japanese army during WWll. One sore spot is the 1937 "Rape of Nanking" in which the entire population of a large Chinese city were subjected to the full vigour of Japan's "normal" manhood. In this incident, over 200,000 Chinese men, women, and children were raped, tortured, shot, bayoneted, and decapitated in a vigourous display of Japanese manliness. Another Senior Japanese politician Takami Eto sparked complaints from China recently after he suggested that the Nanking massacre during World War II was a "big lie".

Mr. Ota's and Mr. Eto's comments were apparently well-received on the campus of Waseda University, Japan's prestigious training ground for future government elite. At Waseda, future government leaders aspiring to be the next Ota or Eto had formed their own gang rape club known as the "Super Free Club". Members of this club allegedly drugged and then gang raped hundreds and perhaps thousands of girls all over Japan. Japanese police, having received hundreds of complaints and eye-witness accounts from victimized women, finally acted on these tips and cracked the case wide open. Arrested members of the "Super Free Club" were shocked and incensed by this heavy-handed police action. Apparently Mr. Ota and Mr. Eto had failed to point out to them that gang rape was acceptable in Japan only if the victims were innocent Chinese women and children.

Friday, July 25, 2003

Hooray for Kofi Annan!!!
It's rare that I can find any decision by the UN that I can agree with but recently the UN Secretary General Kofi Annan actually did something of which I approve. He decided to reject an invitation to attend the big Japanese "We are the Victims!" festival in Hiroshima next month. This event supposedly is to commemorate the A-bomb attack on Hiroshima in August 1945. In reality, the event has been used and manipulated by the Japanese to change or obfuscate their actual role as aggressive, bloodthirsty gang rapist raping and pillaging Asia, into poor, innocent victims of an evil, white, colonial power. Poor Japan! Always the victim!

Ask any Japanese high school student what they know about WWII and they will generally respond that America attacked poor, innocent Japan with an A-bomb! No mention of anything before this event....just that evil America attacked poor, innocent Japan! Every year high school students are herded like sheep (how appropriate) to Hiroshima and Nagasaki so they can see for themselves what happened to poor, innocent Japan in 1945. The powers that be trot out the survivors and they tell their pitiful stories. Then, the high school students shed a few tears and mope around a bit feeling sorry for poor, innocent Japan. Their self-image as victims reinforced, most students soon forget all about it as they return to playing with their cell phones and posing for pictures while making the peace sign. "Oh look! Another Hello Kitty key chain!!!! Kawaii!"

I know this as I work at five different high schools and every year it's the same old shit. Students visit the A-bomb sites and come back and report to me their new-found hatred of "evil America" or their complete indifference which, to me, is even worse. When I ask them why Hiroshima and Nagasaki were attacked none seem to have the slightest clue. It appears to them that America just attacked poor, innocent Japan for no real reason. Mention Nanking, Unit 731, the Bataan Death March, the Burma Railway, Comfort Women, Forced Labor, and any of the other numerous attrocities and all you get are the usual blank stares.....WWII? Pearl Harbor? What's that? Must have been that movie with Ben Affleck! Cho Kawaii!!!!!

Thursday, July 24, 2003

Today I spent over a $150 on lumber so that I may board up the windows to my apartment prior to the election beginning next week.....It won't help much but it's better than nothing. I also bought 100 pounds of cow shit...bet you would like to know what I am going to do with that......

Wednesday, July 23, 2003

Guess what? Next week begins the local city election in this ridiculously over-crowded suburb of Tokyo. So, why should I write about something as minor as a local election? Well, mainly because these elections always bring the idiots out of the woodwork! There are least a dozen people running for every available position. So? How does this affect me, the poor, humble foreigner? Well, beside not being able to vote, even though I am forced to pay local taxes to support this nonsense, every single candidate from mayor right on down to dog-catcher goes out and rents the biggest sound system he can afford, mounts it on a van or truck, and then starts blasting out his name at top volume around and around the city! Yes, you heard me right.....imagine 20 or 30 moronic candidates driving trucks and vans mounted with huge loudspeakers blasting out their names, driving around your neighborhood every five minutes for 12 hours a day for 10 days! Yes, it's true! And whats even more terrifying is that these idiots can be heard 3 miles away!!!!!!

Sometimes these idiots travel in huge groups and try to shout the other candidate down. The resulting tumult completely overwhelms man and beast, sending dogs into high pitched howls and poor foreigners into the streets foaming at the mouth shouting at the idiots to shut the fuck up! Of course, they just wave and keep on blasting out their nonsense because they hope if they ignore you that you will go away. Remember: If I don't see a problem, then the problem doesn't exist! This is particularly annoying to me so I usually do what any right thinking foreigner would do: I climb onto their truck and begin pounding on the windows trying to get inside to strangle their little chicken necks! A 155lb blond hair, blue eyed, raving mad descendant of Thor is a little hard to ignore.....but they do their best.
But they are such considerate people! They wouldn't dare disturb another person?! Yeah, right! And Hirohito was just a kind old man......

Tuesday, July 22, 2003

If I don't see it, it doesn't exist!!!
As a blogger living in Japan there is one consolation....there is always plenty of crap to write about! Take today, for instance. I have so many choices for topics that it is hard to decide which scandal or disgrace I should cover! There is just an endless supply of bullshit for a country so small! Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill! Here in Japan it is no exaggeration!

One particular item did piss me off today, (I know what you are saying, "Only one?").....Well, this is one near and dear to my heart! Here in the land of "safety" there is one particularly aggravating menace that seems impossible for the ever so hardworking (NOT!!) Japanese police to solve....I am referring to the swarms of teenage motorcycle gangs that race through the streets of every Japanese city from dusk to dawn, racing their engines (sans mufflers), waving baseball bats and chains and often carrying loudspeakers playing tunes from the days of Nanking and Pearl Harbor. These "bosozoku" as they are known in Japanese, sound like a swarm of angry hornets as they approach from a distance but when they get closer you realize it's just a bunch of over-indulged, spoiled-rotten, juvenile idiots on stolen bikes pretending to be tough guys. It's really quite ridiculous and I only wish the Hell's Angels would pay them a visit. It would really be quite amusing.

What is the typical Japanese person's reaction to a gang of 13 year old terrorist wannabees? "If I pretend I don't see them, they will just go away!" What is the typical Japanese policeman's reaction? "If I pretend I don't see them, they will just go away!"
Of course, the Japanese Police like to claim that they are doing something. In the paper today, the National Police Agency claims that the numbers of bosozoku have decreased because of their "tough actions"....whatever that may be. In fact, what has apparently happened is that these teenage terrors have finally stolen or extorted enough money to upgrade themselves to cars. Their first act after they buy/steal a car is to remove the muffler so that it sounds "really cool" as one of them explained it to me. Now, instead of having to give up their noisy nightime non-sense because of inclement weather, they are free to terrorize the citizens of this "safety" country, 24 X 7, 12 months a year!!!! And of course, the police can claim that there has been a decrease in bosozoku activity!!!! Amazing, isn't it? No, that's just life in a "safety" country!!!!

Monday, July 21, 2003

I shop, therefore I am.
It's a holiday here in Japan and that means absolute pandemonium in most places. You see, the Japanese allow their employers to dictate every aspect of their lives for them. Where they live, when they may have a day off, and what they should do on that day off. It's easier for them because then they don't have to think about anything. They have been socialized from their first day in kindergarten to not think, only follow orders and most importantly, do exactly like everyone else!!!! This pattern continues until they graduate 12 years later knowing next to nothing about anything. But they have been turned into obedient workers and pliable consumers of over-priced Japanese goods! Then, they sleep their way through university and after graduation they get a job at a big company. There they work as brainless drones 6 days a week, 12-14 hours a day, plus a standard commute of 1.5 hours on crowded trains that would be the envy of the German SS in charge of the Final Solution. So, on their one or two says off a year, the Japanese consumer goes absolutely crazy and rushes to the shops to spend his hard earned yen on over-priced crap. Why? Because everyone else is doing it, therefore, so must I!

The shops here are absolutely amazing. They are designed to turn a supposedly relaxing day into a noisy, stress-filled, nightmare. Every shop is equipped with a loud speaker sysytem which is inevitably pumping out the most inane harmonica music known to man. Simultaneously, they are running another recorded track advertising their sales at top volume. Usually, a high pitched womans voice is used. The result is a high-pitched chalk-board screech designed to split your skull in two. On top of all this is a male salesperson walking around with a megaphone shouting at the top of his lungs about a sale on men's underwear!!!!!!! The result is a deafening, cacophony of sound making it impossible to even think or make yourself heard. Do the Japanese notice anything strange? Are they worried about the subliminal effects of all this shouting? No, they don't think, remember? They just work themselves to death and then on their one day off a year they shop themselves to death. I shop, therefore I am! What's good for the company is good for me! What is good for the company is good for Japan! Banzai!

Sunday, July 20, 2003

Here is a rant from another foreigner fed up with the lies and propaganda:
"I am living the life of one of those gaijin-san
who have lived here since Hirohito bit the dust, actually
since l984. And the myth that that old coot was just a
simple minded, peace loving, marine biologist must be one
of the all time great myths we live by. He made Hitler blush
in shame since the German Nazi only managed to wink out
about 10 million poor souls. Hirohito masterminded one
of the all time great killing machines in world history.
Or at least admired the men who did. I think it is called
guilt by association.
God, I loved your rants about Japan. How many times I've
sat in front of Tsuchirua JR station in Ibaraki and watched
those mindless fascist dickheads parade through the streets
in their Hirohito-mobiles is shocking. Sound machines
blaring along the street reminding the world that 'the
South will rise again' (in this case southern Kanto and most
of the Kansai). I pray not.
I'm in league with you and all gaijin who have
endured the 'safety country' called Japan for years.
Clean country? Well, one must stay on the tourist track.
If you wander off the path, you'll be up to you eyeballs in
old bento boxes, plastic bags, and industrial waste just
dumped into any ol' stream or lake. Did you hear about the
chemical weapons dumped into a lake in Hokkaido at the
end of WWII? I wonder if anyone eats fish from that lake or
irrigates their garden? There is 'no crime' in Japan and
'no pollution'. It is a safety country. Ha!"
Well, it seems as though I have hit a nerve with other foreigners here because my post yesterday generated a lot of email in response! I am glad to hear that I am not the only one suffering from an overdose of Japanese stupidity! It's just a shame that what I am writing about is occurring in so many different parts of this country. At least I know I am not alone! Thanks for all the email and keep it rolling in!



Saturday, July 19, 2003

We Japanese are Peaceful people!
Well that depends on your definition of peaceful. If by "peaceful" you mean violent, misogynistic, xenophobes with an inbred, latent tendency to act violently in groups then I would say that, indeed, the Japanese are a "peaceful" people. This proposition is easily demonstrated by a quick look outside my window. Just make sure you have your earplugs on, two sets are recommended. If you were here right now you would be deafened by the horrific noise.
For the last six hours my apartment has been bombarded by racist, xenophobic abuse from Japan's ultra-nationalist, rabid dogs-foaming-at-the-mouth, fascist right wing. They have been parading around the streets of my city in huge armored buses equipped with gigantic speakers blasting WWII Japanese Army marching band music that must have been popular during the Rape of Nanking (see the link on the right). Yes, they are out there with their jackboots and rising sun flags as well as a few nazi flags, goose-stepping through the streets giving Hitler salutes and shouting unprintable abuse at any foreigner who wanders by. Meanwhile, the police stand idly by yawning and looking bored while numerous laws are broken right in front of their eyes......Are there any counter-demonstrators such as you would see in the USA if the KKK marched through town? No, not a one. Everyone goes about their business as if nothing unusual was happening.....because nothing unusual is happening. Right wing facist exist in Japan only because the "peaceful" Japanese condone their racist, xenophobic actions.....If you don't believe me, just look at the links to your right. Have fun!!!!
Oh, just a moment....some of you have inquired as to why I use the expression "Japan is a safety country!" when it is obviously wrong....well, the answer is that I use the expression only because I hear it in this irregular form every day from the Japanese. Another favorite, "I am safety driver!" It's interesting to note that neither expression is correct in the gramatical nor the physical sense.....



Busy day today spreading the gift of the English language to the clamouring masses.....so, you just have to wait until I have some more time to expose the dark underbelly of this blighted country.....

Friday, July 18, 2003

Japan is a safety country! Part 2
The Japanese love to boast about how safe their wonderful country is but in reality it is fairly dangerous. As I mentioned before, it is not safe for young ladies to ride the trains because of the perverts. It is also not safe for them to walk home from school because of the perverts and rapist who lay siege to them the moment they set foot outside the school gates. There are always strange people hanging out in these areas who make it their habit to expose themselves and do other sick and deviant things. I have often encountered these people, notified the school and asked them to phone for the police but their response was always "That's too difficult.....the police know that person and have warned him before but they won't take any action until he actually hurts someone." This is the actual response I received from the principal of my high school after I spotted a strange black van with darkened windows outside the school gate. The driver was actually in the street waving his miniscule winkie at the students!!!!!
The police don't actually try to prevent crime here.....they merely take reports from crime victims and then generally do nothing. Here is a story that spells this out quite clearly: http://www.japantoday.com/e/?content=shukan&id=186
The Japanese police do little, if anything, unless, of course, a foreign person is involved. Then the foreigner is automatically guilty and is usually arrested on the spot. I was warned not to interfere with the perverts because I would be arrested instead of the pervert! You can be held for 21 days without being charged and during that time you are guaranteed to be tortured into signing a confession written in Japanese. You do not have access to a lawyer nor can you make a phone call. Basically, you are screwed! But, Japan is safety country!!!
Japan is safety country!
Yeah, and I am an eccentric millionaire who lives in Japan because I like sushi!
These boneheads would have you believe this because they like to think they are special and better than everyone else....however, they are only half right! I bet you can guess which half I am talking about, right? They are indeed a "special" people.....Here are some statistics for you:
70% of Japanese high school girls have been repeatedly sexually molested while riding the trains. The actual number may be higher because I have never met a student yet who hasnt been molested. Normally, everybody on the train is aware of what is happening but 99% of the time they pretend nothing is happening.
Many students have admitted to me that they were raped! Of course, they seldom report these events because the police usually blame the victim for provoking the attack! The victim will also be ostracized by the entire community because she disturbed the "Wa" or harmony. Remember: The nail that sticks up gets hammered down! A famous Japanese expression!
Approximately 30% of high school girls in Japan sell their bodies for expensive designer handbags such as Louis Vuitton and Chanel. The numbers again are probably higher because the police don't consider this a crime and don't keep records. A smaller number of junior high school girls do the same thing!!!! Who are their customers? Teachers, policemen, businessmen.....there have been many cases that were reported in the news recently only because the customer killed the girl in question.....On any day in my city you can walk to the train station and see high school girls in uniform openly soliciting men. The most common method is through the internet. I have even seen students from my school (I am a high school teacher) carrying big sign boards around the station advertising sex clubs!!!!!! When I reported this to the school I was told that there was nothing they could do and the other Japanese teachers just laughed nervously and pretended that nothing had disturbed the all important "wa"!
Still have your doubts? Well, read the articles on this webpage:
http://mdn.mainichi.co.jp/waiwai/index.html

Thursday, July 17, 2003

Projectile vomiting and Public pissing!!!
"Japan is a clean country and America should strive to emulate the clever Japanese!" Yeah, right! BULLSHIT!!!! Walk around in any Japanese city and the first thing you will notice, if you are not trampled to death first by the crowds of gawking imbeciles, is the stench of piss and vomit mixed with nasty, cheap tobacco smoke! These planks like to get shit-faced on a daily basis and then vomit and piss where-ever the mood strikes them....this includes the sidewalks and the train platforms!!!! They will even shit in the hallways of apartments buildings and parking lots when there are plenty of public facilities available!!! Disgusting!!!! But they are so clean and clever! Bullshit!!!
Hold on! Did I mention the toxic waste dump?
How could I forget? Japan is the land of dumping! They dump anything, anywhere, anytime and feel not the least twinge of guilt about it.....unless someone sees them....then they make a face like your dog when you catch him shitting in the middle of the living room! "Ooops, did I do something bad?" WHAT! You just want to smack them with a rolled up newspaper and then rub their noses in their trash while scolding them! Trust me....force is the only thing they understand!

Wednesday, July 16, 2003

Lest we forget.....Did I mention the deplorable absence of birdlife? The exception being huge crows which fight over the garbage scraps every morning at 5:30am, waking me up with their wretched cacophony of cackling and cawing? The delightful shit splatters which these airborne weasels leave on every street corner and sometimes on you adds that extra special lift to your day!
Oh, wait a moment! Did I mention the complete lack of greenery? No trees, flowers, or grass except the artificial stuff that covers the numerous multi-level golf driving ranges that blot the landscape? The only color to be seen is the tacky plaid golfing outfits of the half-sloshed, spaghetti-limbed, limp-wristed, lolita-lusting specimens of Japanese manhood who swagger and stagger about the place only to projectile vomit once they get into the parking lot......

Well, where to begin???? There is so much to say.....First, let me describe where I am....imagine, if you will, a city, a suburb of Tokyo actually, of about 500,000 jibbering-jabbering, beer-soaked, low-class, in-bred Japanese rednecks, stuffed into an area about the size of DisneyWorld.....next add in some of the worst Stalinist inspired, East-German designed architecture and you have a good picture of the blighted world from which I now reach out to you....my poor, innocent reader.
You can go insane trying to stay sane in an insane world....

I don't care if anyone reads this but in case you do stumble across it, just know that this is my somewhat juvenile attempt to spread the truth about this nightmare land known as Japan......forget what crap you think you know about this place.....unless you have spent any time here rubbing elbow to asshole with these perverted cretins then I doubt you know what the real truth is......stand by to be enlightened..... 
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